Facebook Twitter
298 Kinderkamack Road, Oradell, NJ 07649


Bergen County Players, inc.


«  »April 2019

Rumors: Auditions


January 3, 2019 (Thursday) at 7:30pm
January 8, 2019 (Tuesday) at 7:30pm
January 9, 2019 (Wednesday) at 7:30pm

Call-backs: (by invitation only)
January 12, 2019 (Saturday) at 11:00am



Bergen County Players
298 Kinderkamack Road
Oradell, NJ 07649



  • Ken Gorman  - He is Charley’s, the deputy mayor's, lawyer.  He is the guy who thinks of and then takes the responsibility for the cover up.  The paradox of his character is that he is trying to exert logic over the situation while being in a state of panic.
  • Chris Gorman – She is Ken’s wife who wants no part of this cover up but is not strong enough to get out of it.  She does what Ken says but not without duress and loss of control over her smoking and drinking.  She wants to tell everyone else but doesn’t have the strength to do it.
  • Lenny Ganz – He is Charley’s accountant who is basically a sensible person.  He is usually confident and friendly, but, due to the car accident and the party situation, he is unhappy and tense. When he finds out about Charley, he challenges Ken for control and wants to call the police.  But he plays along to get through the night.
  • Claire Ganz – She is Lenny’s wife who is pretty self-absorbed and wants to have a good time at the party tonight.  Her vanity is obvious through her concern for appearances – her lip, her dress, Cookie’s dress, etc. She is usually a step behind the others, does what others tell her, and is content in her ignorance.
  • Ernie Cusack – Ernie is a psychiatrist and is ever the conciliator.  His main concern is to make his wife happy and have a good time. He joins the conspiracy to avoid the law.  He is content in his interaction with Cookie as compared to how he interacts with the others.
  • Cookie Cusack – Ernie’s wife and a TV personality.  She wants to relax and have a good time since she works all the time cooking for her family, her show, etc.  She is not too happy about the plan to cook the meal but she buys into the story and agrees to cook.  Her back issue is probably a common thing and the pillow she has does not really help and usually gets in the way.
  • Glenn Cooper – One of Charley’s friends who is a candidate for state senate.  He is trying to fend off his wife’s accusation that he is having an affair and, when he finds out what is going on, avoid the scandal of both Charley’s situation and the affair he is having. The situation at the party is always putting pressure on him and making it difficult to contain his lying.
  • Cassie Cooper – Glenn’s wife, who is singularly determined to get Glenn to admit his infidelity.  She is frazzled about having to maintain and outward show of decorum thinking that his friends all know about the affair.  She is too wrapped up in her own drama to realize the Charley situation.
  • Ben Welch – The policeman who has come to investigate one thing but finds out that there is more to this party than meets the eye.  His natural police sense pushes him on to get on to get to the bottom of the mess.  He is a bit authoritative but not enough to be threatening, which allows the group to scam him.
  • Pudney – She is the policewoman working with Welch.  She follows orders and does what she is told.

Performance Dates May 3rd - June 2nd 2019
(A benefit performance is scheduled for May 30.)
(No performances - on the following dates: Mothers’ Day, Sunday, May 12, Memorial Day Weekend - Friday - Sunday - May 24-26)



 • Audition scenes/monologues are included below and are identified by pages in the text, characters, and lines that start and end the scenes. NOTE: the page numbers are those that appear in the script provided by the director. Please review the scenes/monologues that contain the characters in which you are interested.

• Memorization is not necessary. Please note - these are potential audition scenes/monologues. The scenes used will depend on who shows up at a particular audition date.

  • Ken/Chris- pp. 15&16 (I don’t know why…You mean falling at their feet…)
  • Lenny/Claire - pp. 22-23 (This is very weird…I said forget it);  pp. 23-25 (…All right. Come here…CAROLE NEWMAN??…)   
  • Ken/Chris/Lenny/Claire - pp. 33-35 (Ken, Myra and I…Are we ready?)
  • Lenny/Claire/Ernie/Cookie/Chris - pp. 36-39 – (Cookie! Ernie!…I’ve got her.); pp. 39-42 (The cushion…Okay then it’s settled)
  • Chris/Claire - pp. 52-53 (You know what this night…The hell with it…)                   
  • Glenn/Cassie  - pp. 55-56 (Do I look all right?…No, Mr. Perfect…); pp. 57-59 (What is this thing…Fine. Don’t let my friends…)
  • Ken/Chris/Lenny/Claire/Glenn/Cassie/Ernie/Cookie – pp. 66-69 (Is there a cat in here?…Hello?…Hello?); pp. 72-75 (Something’s wrong with Ken…I liked the duck…)
  • Ken/Chris/Lenny/Claire/Glenn/Ernie/Cookie – pp. 86-87 (Just calm down…Maybe it’s Harry…)
  • Ken/Chris/Lenny/Claire/Glenn/Ernie/Cookie/Glenn – pp. 87-89 (We got trouble…Maybe Dudley called the police.); pp. 89-91 (It’s the phone again…THERE WAS NO HITLER PROGRAM…); PP. 91-94 (We have to let them in…Let’s go kids.…)
  • Ken/Chris/Claire/Glenn/Ernie/Cookie/Glenn/Welch – pp. 101-102 (I’m glad to see…It’s okay…); pp. 102-105 (I know I’ve seen…I guess it is.…)
  • Welch – monologue – p. 106
  • Lenny – monologue – pp.109-110 (Okay…let’s see…the story…my wife is sloshed and I’m completely toasted…)


THE PLAY - The action finds us at the deputy mayor’s anniversary dinner party where the first guests arrive to find the hostess missing and the host upstairs with a superficial gunshot wound. To prevent a scandal, the first couple wants to cover up the shooting and tries to hide this from the second and the second from the third and so on until all the guests are caught up in a web of rumor and misunderstanding

• Auditions will be closed.

• Actors, in addition to reading from the script, will be asked to perform improvisations (provided by the director).

• Actors should read the play and be familiar with the basics of the story and of the character for which they are auditioning. 

• Actors should also be prepared to specify the character for which they are auditioning but be open to the director’s request to read for another.

• Those auditioning for the couples will have a short “dance improv” audition.

• There are roles for 5 men and 5 women, set up as four couples, and two police.  As the play is written, the age ranges for three of the couples are mid 40’s while the fourth couple is a bit older. The male police role is also bit older, and the female police role a bit younger.  But, as is the case with Community Theater, there is, within reason, flexibility in these ages.  If I think I could make it work, I’ll do my best.

All this being said about the characters, I will be looking mostly for actors who can handle the quick paced dialogue and the physical acting demands of doing a farce.

If you are interested in an electronic copy of the script, send an email to the director, Peter Colletto at kilgore218@gmail.com.  If electronic scripts are not your thing, this is a very popular script, which you will find in many Neil Simon anthologies in many public libraries. Also, if you have any questions contact the director at 201-679-8244.


****In case you missed this when I said it above -  All this being said about the characters, I will be looking mostly for actors who can handle the quick paced dialogue and the physical acting demands of doing a farce.

If anyone has questions please contact the director, Peter Colletto by email at kilgore218@gmail.com or by phone/text at 201-679-8244


« back